All right, I've calmed down ;X My last post was quite emotional and self-righteous, but after some talks with Sapphirefly and thinking about what I had tried to avoid seeing, I have only myself to blame for my thoughts. But it's better to find out the reasons why I was frustrated, and it's absolutely fantastic to have some readers who understand what I'm trying to do with DS. I will work harder to make things clearer for the rest, but won't compromise the content.
In the second part of ch5, Van and his chief vassals meet the diplomat from Basram, and the scene is supposed to have a particular nuance, each person with deeper thoughts than he'd reveal in speech. But it's so hard to write Van as I imagined he'd be. And it's so intimidating, because when I'm writing the scene, I imagine Van standing at my shoulder and rolling his eyes at all the stupid things in his dialogue >_< Maybe I'll skip that part for now, and finish the ending first.
Yesterday's sentence:
Sometimes Leal felt his well-intended comments were more like nagging from a surrogate father instead of light recommendations from a subject, and he often thought of Balgus and how he had managed to raise this boy-king.
2 comments:
LOL I get the exact same feeling when I'm writing «Van dialogue». After writing each sentence I start thinking: "This sucks" or "He would never say that" or "This looks more like what a girl would say" or "Guys don't talk this much! They live on short to-the-point sentences!" and that sort of things.
Mostly I'm conflicted with this: guys don't usually talk much, especially «tough» guys like Van. But if I make him talk like a «typical» guy... he'll have almost no dialogue.
Maybe it's just me. Maybe I'm just surrounded by the wrong kind of guys. In my «research» for my fic, I started watching and listening to how guys talk and act. I thought I could make Van look realistic. But it's not that easy. LOL
I think it's true that most guys say more to the point sentences, but it depends on their personality. Van, though, is very terse, but I think you have a different Van in mind for your fic.
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