Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Character Details

Okay, I lied about ch 3 being almost done. Now that I realize how much I can improve on my original story outline, I will probably not post until I finish all the beginning chapters (1-5). It seems there's always more things to add to a chapter, especially feelings and little details about the characters.

And that's what I've been testing my limits on, this week. Major characters need to have detail and hints at motivations, and secondary characters support the side plots, but the rules on minor characters are more ambiguous. Of course, not every Soldier #1 needs to have his dress ensemble spelled out, but beyond necessary descriptions to make the master recordkeeper, the captain of intelligence, and the housemother exist, what takes them out of the anonymity of their titles and transcends them into memorable characters?

After toying around with different descriptions and sentences, the imporant substance seems to be "characterization through action and detail" (The Portable MFA in Creative Writing).

I'll use Van as an example of what I've been trying to do.

We start off with the simple things:
Why does he wear loose shirt and slim pants? Why does he get to dress so informally when his staff wear armor of rank? Does he ever takes his gloves off?

Personal space gives character:
What's in his room? In his study? In his audience hall? Where does he place his sword when he's asleep?

And so does food:
What does he like to eat? What is his comfort food? What does he eat on traditional holidays? What foodstuffs are imported?

Then we can delve into motivations and feelings:
How does he feel about Hitomi's reappearance after ten years? What does he think his advisors feel? What does he think the other countries feel?


Today's sentence is: "She had never directly requested his presence, and had never asked as if she only expect acquiesce."

Tuesday, June 27, 2006

Progress Update 3

Ch 3 finally turned around with rewrites on Hitomi's section. With some delving into Van's feelings on Hitomi's return, the chapter will be soon done.

I moved around some scenes between ch 3, 4, and 5 for logical effect. The story outline is working out excellently (haha, what a horrible word), although I might swap scenes or even chapter into different order.

Much thanks to Sapphirefly and Chocolatelova's guidance and suggestions--the main political tension between Basram, Cesario, and Fanelia is now answered ^^v It will carry through all the way to the end. If I can just execute it as it deserves, it will be fantastic.


Best Sentence of the Day (although about her dissertation) made me think about what I'd pick. Mine for today is:
A whole afternoon indoors watching the rain and the pedestrians, with peppermint gelato and each other for company—was there any better recipe for romance?

Monday, June 26, 2006

Van of Fanelia

As I'm writing about Van in ch 3, I like what I'm giving to his character, but I'm not sure if it's too transparent by noting it out in the narrative. Perhaps I should instead make it a little mysterious, a surprise for the reader to find?

Here's one of the paragraphs in consideration:
"It wasn’t that he was ungrateful of his lineage, or despised his status. On the contrary, the weight of his obligations were so imbued into each decision since early childhood, that the understanding of “I am Fanelia” no longer intruded into his thoughts, except in times of doubt when his policies enforced greater good at the price of individual grief."

And as I'm detailing out the political landscape, I find myself building Van and Fanelia, too. It started with a question my boyfriend raised: If Van and Escaflowne are so powerful, then other countries must have strong motivations for their actions toward Hitomi.

But, I think I'm making Van too perfect. There needs to be some selfishness, some secret thoughts, some irresponsibility. Maybe I'll make him revert a little to his former self.

Saturday, June 24, 2006

Late Night

I work on my fic late at night, and by the time I go to bed I'm usually still thinking about a sentence or a plot point. I would visual a certain scene and sometimes act it out. Problem is, I would be in my bed, all snuggled in with my pillows and comforter just right, the layer of air inside turned cozy, so I loathe getting out of bed to sit in front of the bright screen, even though I know that if I don't do it, I won't be able to remember it in the morning.

Yesterday I dug out my digital voice recorder, but I quickly discovered two problems with this plan: 1) Sleepiness doesn't help coherance when I already talk worse than I write. 2) It's embarrassing to be talking to myself when my boyfriend is also in bed.


In other news: I've thought of a great solution for Van's wings. It will be exciting and perfect for that situation.

I've been working on ch 3 for almost 2 weeks ; ; Maybe I should just delete Hitomi's paragraphs and start with something new.

Thursday, June 22, 2006

Learning Experience

- Character development is absolutely essential. For inspid passages of exposition or narrative, tie them back to the characters to gain focus and significance.

- Abandon pedestrian metaphors and similes. Slightly unsettling word combinations are pleasant surprises and transmit mood better. Omit needless words.

- Approach with an effect in mind.

- Each word and each sentence should be able to stand alone. The right word will make the sentence shine. Beyond a word's meaning, consider connotation, sound, and feeling.

- Leave meaning to reader's imagination, but clarify all actions and transitions.

- Don't tell. Show.

- If it feels wrong, it probabably needs to be deleted.

It's amazing how much I've learned from this project in these two months. Looking back at my early blog posts, I feel like I've come so far ^^ Besides my own reading into good English, grammar, writing advice, and a new perspective when reading others' works, I've also learned from experience and conversations with my writing buddies. Much <3 to Sapphirefly and Chocolatelova-- for our discussions about writing techniques, character motivations, and scenes in the series, and for their support for me in both writing and personal lives.

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Project Summary

Algelic's comment on my previous post made me realize that I failed to condense my project plan into one summary post, so here it is!

Title:
Deeper than the Sky

Summary:
Van had his duties, Hitomi had her life; the single moment had become memory. Ten years later, they receive a second chance to understand the true meaning of the fate they chose, for both Gaea and their future. (series continuation)

Theme Song (lol):
"Into the Light," from Escaflowne OST 3

There's elements of politics, drama, action, and of course, lots of romance. <3 I've planned for 21 chapters, but that number might change depending on how it goes.

The following is from ch 3. Sapphirefly had liked it, so it's probably a good glimpse paragraph into my storytelling, although it doesn't touch any plot point.

Van tossed the last sheaf of papers across the table and reached absentmindedly for his cup. The tea was down to its sad cold dregs. Sighing, he glanced toward the door for signs of his household staff. Was it already time for shift changes? A look out the unshuttered window confirmed the time—the twin moons were high in the sky, pale against the net of stars—past two already. The last report had occupied him for some time. Finding spare parchment underneath the paperweight, he wrote “continue surveillance” with a quill, signed it with his mark, folded the sheet into a letter, and pressed his seal into the wax. He held his handiwork up to the light and grinned. His council had requested permission to create an official seal many times, but neither could he be bothered with an object not in his possession at all times, nor could he be bothered with a signet ring that would impede mobility. To the council’s chagrin, he had always used the most natural seal on his person—the Fanelian crest on his sword.

Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Thinking

I haven't yet decided on some things, but writing it out will help me:

- How does Hitomi and Van see each other while they were apart? Is it actual communication? Is it a vision? Is it images that they can send each other by their thoughts? Is it only their imagination, and there's no actual communication at all? I'm sort of leaning toward the last one (her image of Van on a rock might be any of the three), but perhaps it doesn't need to be defined at all.

- The first conflict over her pendant is in ch 2 (this was what I added to ch 2 that made the chapter better). Revelation of the mystery is in ch 12. Is that too far apart? Do I need to give little hints and details in between?

- It's highly ironic that I'm trying to write politics' mysteries and convolutions for the overall plot while I never followed it in my life... Maybe I should change it to something I actually know about >o<

- How would Van show his wings? He obviously values it for its functionality, but there's so much feelings attached to its use--common perception of its curse, Goau and Varie's marriage, Varie's instructions to Van, Merle and Hitomi's acceptance, Folken's black wings, etc.--that I can't imagine the decision to bare it is trivial. But I want to create a circumstance, that instead of being forced to use it in the time of greatest need, Van decides to show it for its emotional purpose. What should it be, and who should see it? Should I tell it from Van, to show his thoughts as he makes the decision, or from Hitomi, to show her understanding of his decision? Perhaps the latter; it sounds more fun.

Sunday, June 18, 2006

Feelings

There's something about female friends that I can never find from male friends. I'm not sure what the precise quality it is--companionship? ability to rant together? understanding of feelings?--but it's absolutely fantastic to feel very depressed and confused about a certain situation, and your friends accept you as you are, and even though you guys might not discuss very much about it or think of a solution to solve the problem, at the end of the talking session, you feel so much better.

Perhaps it's all in gender differences to how we react to crisis. Relationship pyschology books say that when males perceive problems, they immediately want to fix it, but when females perceive problems, they immediately want to talk about it.

Because of this, I have planned for Hitomi's mother and Yukari to know about Hitomi's experience on Gaea. I make Hitomi come back to Japan into the same situation at the school nurse's office, so although there's no difference in their lives besides her missing pendant, Hitomi must be feeling so many emotions from everything that happened on Gaea, from her separation with Van, that despite it being so private into her own self, she has to tell someone who would understand implicitly and completely. And although it's such an outrageous tale, that someone would, in the end, accept everything about Hitomi.

This will also be important in Hitomi's relationships with Van and Sousuke, because besides being about sacrifices and compromises, relationship is also about trust, self-reliance, and knowing when to let go.

Friday, June 16, 2006

Twenty-something Crossroad

Despite my plans, I didn't work on the story at all since the last update. This week had been a tangle of unhappiness, and I needed some time to think about what I really want in life and how to pick up the pieces. I think this is why I based Hitomi's conflict as a twenty-something's evaluation of life and goals--because what better experience do I know besides my own? (Although, of course, mine is not quite as full in the planet-teleportation area and seriously lacking a pretty boy Van.)

Twenty-something is a strange time--we finish school and start our careers, step into the adult world, see our friends settle down and have babies, hear our parents ask us when our marriages would be, try out some job changes, experiment with some new hobbies, meet new friends... Perhaps it's my own personality, but conforming to professional business expectations was difficult, and now that I'm close to what my boss wants me to be, I feel like I've lost some essential part of my soul. It's time to stop, to breathe, to think. Even if we previously had plans for the future, it seems time ripe to reexamine them, to choose another possibility. After all, what better time to choose than this crossroad between leaving our childhood behind and starting our future and new family?


Enough introspection. Sometimes I scare myself.

Perhaps inspiration for writing sometimes only need a forced sitting in front of the computer. I will try that this weekend. I shall, I shall, finish ch 3 and 4.

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Character Motivations

Combined some of my thoughts together into one post:

Hitomi:
I just thought of a fantastic reason for them to lose touch with each other during the intervening years. This adulthood characterstic, the desire to become normal and fit in to society, is especially strong in Japanese culture.

Rambling on with numerous "what if" statements is awesome ^^

Yamamoto Sousuke:
He will be an interesting character if I can just add some more to him. His name is composed of "mountain roots, world help". He's a man of a past era. A foil to Allen. I like to think of him as someone Van might have turned out to be, and Hitomi would be happy with him, in other circumstaces.

Van:
Van's father figures are rather problematic. There's Goau, who died when he was 3, so he couldn't have remembered very much about him. In fact, Van's only flashback during the series about him was his death. There's Folken, 10 years older, but disappeared when he was 5, and later discovered to be the traitor of his country. Then there's Balgus, who was father enough with his training and discipline, but never crossed the master-servant line in polite address.

If Van had never met Hitomi, I don't think he would turn out the same way.

Merle:
Many fanfic authors portray Merle in love with Van, especially in continuation stories. I don't really agree. Yes, she's very protective of him, cannot bear to be separated, and is jealous of his attention. But she was only 13. She was orphaned from a young age (she must have been less than 3 when Van tried to fly) and seemed to live in the castle as almost-sibling, despite the cultural prevalence of beastmen and humans living in separate communities, so she must have understood the significance of the family's trust and love in her. Like Balgus, she never dropped honorifics nor polite verb endings when she talked to Van.

And in her "Cat Delicacy" song, she said she dreamt "you" turned into a white cat--so I think, ultimately, that she must fall in love with a cat.


Progress:
  • I've added in a crucial plot point into ch 2 that I failed to think about before. The chapter is much better, now.
  • Needs more character plans for Sousuke and Yukari if I want to add in deeper developments into ch 1. Right now it's a little too fairy tale.
  • This week's plan: finish editing ch 3 and 4. Add in adulthood. Develop Leal. Cut out slow parts: needs more focus.

Sunday, June 11, 2006

Picture

I'm working again on the opening chapters this afternoon, so here's my promise of the picture that makes me write this fanfic:

Thursday, June 08, 2006

A Guilty Conscience

Chocolatelova read my story outline today and said that it will take a long time to write and that I need commitment ;x; I think that's why I post all the time--because I'm horrible with project longevity. To make the process so public (at least to my friends who read), I force myself to continue, to not disappoint them. There's nothing so effective on me as guilt, after all.

Of course, right after I posted chapter titles, I added some more scenes and made it 21 chapters. I will restart writing soon--the storyline is almost at the point that I cannot force it into good alterations and resolutions, that I must write and let the characters carry on by themselves and see where they take me.

Even though I've tried to develop interesting plots and character developments, it's really the romance that drives me. Atrocious, I know. But it's so hard to stop my obsession with Van.

When I start writing again, I'll celebrate and post the screenshot that makes me write such a conclusion to the series.

Wednesday, June 07, 2006

Deeper than the Sky

Worked on some more chapter storylines and finished all the titles. Although, as I continue the project, these will probably change!

Deeper than the Sky
  1. The Beginning of Happiness
  2. The Bright World
  3. Reminiscence
  4. A Second Start
  5. Morning Surprises
  6. Escaflowne Ten Year Reunion
  7. Lost
  8. Past Wounds
  9. Stay with Me
  10. Tracing the Way to You
  11. Return of the Angel
  12. The Waters of Elamere
  13. Answers
  14. In the Rain
  15. Goodbye
  16. Midsummer Blossoms
  17. Deeper than the Sky
  18. Vigil
  19. I'm Home
Although, my storyboard now make some of my already written chapters obsolete ; ;

Monday, June 05, 2006

Overwriting

After yesterday's excitement into the wee morning hours revisiting my previous prose, today Chocolatelova told me she liked the original better ; ;

"Van's thought process was more unrefined, passionate, and more confused, and it drove the story really well. In your rewrite, he comes across as a little too polished and thought-through...which takes away some of the original oomf and the rapid pace of the story."

When I told this to Trephine, he said that's the reason why some writers still use typewriters--because it should either be really good the first time, or you toss the paper and try again.

So much for overwriting, I guess.

But I do like the prose of the edited story better. There must be a middle ground!


-> I took away several sentences that seemed too idealistic.
Still need: introduction of Van without being facetious.

The Dragon Cannot Cross the Line



From Chocolatelova's mention of my previous Escaflowne story, The Dragon Cannot Cross the Line, I read it again yesterday and agree that it could really be better. My verb tenses are running everywhere, thought italics are confusing and unncessary, and there's a superior lyrics translation. Beyond these blatant mistakes, practice and discussions with my writing buddies have really strengthened my abilities to write better.

I watched ep 19 again (it's all really an excuse to watch Van blush), then spent maybe 6 hours editing the prose. I like the new version much better, but there's still a few spots that have awkward transitions, and although I love the song, it still seems to obstruct the flow of the story. Or should I claim that as a purposeful, artistic method? Ha.

Major changes:
- made everything present tense
- eliminated most of the flashback quotes
- Van's thoughts merged with his narrative. No need for italics
- better translation for "Mystic Eyes". Added another section of the song
- added to Van's thought process--more on his decision about Hitomi

I'll let it sit for a day or two before I repost.

Saturday, June 03, 2006

Progress Update 2

Yesterday night, I edited half my storyline, and it's now a lot tighter--18 chapters instead of 25. I moved quite a bit of scenes around to more logical places, added more interaction between characters, and decided on most of the chapter titles. Ironically, project title is still at large.

Things to do:
  1. finish editing second half
  2. more interest to the series' minor characters, for flavor and diversity. It's like pepper.
  3. love trianges needs more excitement. Maybe there needs to be more secrets.
  4. after climax of the story, it loses steam, and the main political tension that bursts at the very end becomes so blah.
  5. what should challenge V+H's bond?
  6. hints of future events, besides war
  7. character sketches for new characters: Leal, other advisors, Ramu, Cesario's diplomat, Cesario's king, Cesario's chief minister, Basram's president, his newphew

I really want my project to be something special. Despite how the "make sense" ending rips my heart out and stomps on it, I've been obsessed with Escaflowne for years. Hell, I've been obsessed with a little 15 year old boy for years. I know that the story would probably turn out okay anyways, because Van and Hitom are such strong characters, but I really want to put in the effort to adhere to the series, to create a possible continuation story, to pay my homage to Escaflowne staff. I really want to put in the effort to make it delightful for readers who are just as obsessed as I am.

Although, the ultimate want for all of us is probably just a Van to call our own.

Friday, June 02, 2006

Tributes

Yesterday night I was rereading my favorite stories on ff--in particular, Chocolatelova's prologue for The Last Night of the World--and I thought to myself, I wish that ff allows a star rating, or at least some way I can recommend stories and write my comments to them in my profile.

The next best thing, of course, was a fanfic tribute system within my stories. These Escaflowne fanfics stand out in significance in my reading on ff:

Angel of Fire - Wink57CS
Because I don't know what love is, Angel of Mine - Dariel
Mystic Eyes - Aishuu
Princess of La Vallex - Aurora-sakura
Dragon's Moon, Mystic Wings, Mark of a Goddess - Sapphirefly
The Last Night of the World - Chocolatelova
And Along Comes Prince Charming - Dahee Fanel
Dearly Beloved - Starry Eyed Wonder
(Hmm, did I miss anything?)

I admire these authors in one aspect or another. I will definately write a long paragraph on each of these, how they changed my perspective on characters, how they changed the way I felt about writing, and their special details that stand as mementos to my Escaflowne obsession.

For some reason, only two are continuation of the series. Sapphirefly had thought it was because AU is much easier to write. Hmm...?

Progress Update

Yay, finished the key scene in ch 19 tonight. I've been skipping around the story this week, planning the romantic chapters, testing out the dialogue. The distinction between fluffy and sappy dialogue is sometimes a thin line ; ;

The romance portions definately are superior to my other scenes, although it had been a struggling exercise to adhere to a character-limited third person narrative. The omniscient narrator is just too distant and confusing for snuggly scenes. I'll have to go back and fix the narrator who ran away with her thoughts in ch 15.


Sapphirefly had challenged me to add more plot detail to each chapter, and to condense some of the less exciting ones, but unfortunately I haven't been a good girl and worked on it very much. Part of the problem is my stupid obsession to have as many chapters as episodes in the series, although I really don't have enough character development and subplots beyond the Van + Hitomi romance to make this long haul exciting all the way. I had planned to drag out the existing characters, and do some character interaction, but so far it's only two minor subplots, and superficial story development.

Perhaps I should think about a new character, like Josceline (/love), or even Armand.

Definately need to settle down on some real chief vassal names, though. We can't have the Horn, Tusk, and Claw Army leaders be nameless.


I really liked Sapphirefly's title for the story, Tracing the Way to You, but I feel it's a little too long. I also use a lot of water scenes and imagery (I hope this isn't my inner pervert coming out), so I was thinking about having some sort of water title, like Catch the Rain, only less dumb.