Van's PPF (continued)

Sometimes I wonder if my writing motivation is conceit. Perhaps. I mean, I did start the DS project because "hey I can do better than 90% of people on here" and "dude I'll show them how an Escaflowne fanfic can be written as real fiction". I don't know which is more disconcerting--the fact that DS is based on these egotistical thoughts or that I'm revealing it in this post. (My only comfort is my scarce but treasured blog readers, who will most definitely forgive me.)

Writing is an oxymoron that allows the writer to take an identity and also reveal himself. Perhaps there is no escape from my self.


Well, let's jump back before I wander off to the next philosophical discussion: Yesterday we were on the subject of "Van's PPF" (past present future), and I've also hastily put in my deadline for ch6, lest I escape again. (My other confession today? My last written work on DS was in April ; ;) With 3 weeks left and a whole ch ahead, let us rush headlong into it, then.

I had previously considered the possibility of cutting Van's dialogue with Basram's diplomat, on the pretense of sparing the readers the political boredom (and me a public hazing), but now I see it would be necessary to not only keep the section, but to excel at its execution.

Esca ff authors and readers alike assume that Hitomi's decision to stay is the keystone to an Esca continuation. But to me, Van is the main character in Escaflowne, and it is Van again who must be the essence of the story. We cannot jump from Van 10 years ago to Van's actions in the rest of DS, without first seeing how Van is a king in Fanelia.

We've already missed Van as king in ep2--after his coronation he is immediately downgraded into nothing more than a refugee with a royal title. All through the series we see little of Van the king. But it is precisely his lineage and rule that define who he is and what kind of person Hitomi must become in order to match Van.

The tricky thing is execution of the idea, of course. Will I have enough skill to portray Van as who he is now and what he will become?

At least, the goal for ch6 is clear. The best time to start is always tomorrow ;3a


I can't remember if I've posted this, so you get the pleasure of getting it again:


Edit: From my previous blog posts it looks like I've written in July, but both the DS working file and my backup are from April. WHERE IS MY FILE.

Van's PPF

In a previous post, I've mentioned I'd like to resolve the juxtaposition of Van's gravity and boyishness. But a deeper portrayal and my challenge in ch6 is Van's PPF--how he has changed these 10 years and how he will be at the end of DS. And I think in order to do this, V's meeting with Basram's diplomat will be a definite landmark.

...
There is supposed to be a meaning to this post. I apologize. It's late, and my brain is like mush and I must fall into bed. Will try again tomorrow.

Oh, before I duck out of this: I will publish ch6 before Christmas.

Back Again

The other day a ff email told me I got another reader on the story alert list. It made me happy--and a little guilty--I had no idea people are still reading Deeper than the Sky. (Curiously, ch5 has 40 more hits than ch4. Are the readers skipping ahead to the most recent ch, hoping for more closure, or do they reread ch5 again for Van?)

Perhaps there is no need to write an apology--only ch6 will compensate my year absence.

Hello again. m(_ _)m


Ch6 still remains elusive. My original plan was to have Van's meeting with Basram for its first half, and Van+Hitomi's meeting second. But I'm having such trouble with the political meeting, its dialogue and its innuendos, what Van should be as a ruler now and his maturity later, how much of Basram and its complications I should present. Would it be so bad to cut it out, and filter the meeting through Hitomi's experience? Or would this instead be even more confusing because it would be a second-hand of a second-hand?

Most likely, the only way to find out is to write it.


A drawing from a long time ago:

Notebook 2

Today marks the end of my second notebook (10/2006-07/2007). It's scary that almost none of it is entered in my Google notebook, but it's good that I've filled it with a lot of self-dialogue and ideas for DS.

One of the ideas today was to make Hitomi's transport from Earth to Gaea at the end of ch1 more significant in the overall plot. Gem had requested me to make Hitomi go through a depression, and while I think of Hitomi as too splunky to get real depression, a great spin-off possibility is to have her go through self-doubt in the midst of great expectations. Hitomi is the type to emerge stronger emotionally from adversity, and this experience would become her pivotal point in DS.

I was reminded of Nase in Hikaru no Go, at the end of the go pro examinations, when she said "Because I can play like today, I can't quit go." (That's sort of how I feel about my life now, too :P)


I cannot remember where I got this image. Probably from Lizzard. It's interesting to see the other Knights of Caeli:

Names

Random names, might be used for characters, might be used for locations:

Besnik - Sulare - Taussler - Stenin - Heriz - Jonam - Vosnik - Osarnum - Zare - Elat - Guerdia - Zossler - Tare - Kulot - Phi - Palome - Olam - Emon - Krisnet - Mossi - Basile - Digge - Malek - Nolan - Torron - Nauntig - Ala'Ramutad - Nafarem - Hamorfa - Guern - Vort - Epautib - Kalev - Vonui

1. Some are pretty crappy, I know. I don't want to use any normal names, because it's Gaea.

2. Would using names like Ala'Ramutad for a distant country be too politically incorrect?

3. I think of the names in Japanese pronounciation (eg. Balgus = Barugesu), so names like Zare is two syllables instead of one. But then the pretension that carries with a phonetic explanation at the end of a ch is probably more serious than reading it wrong.

4. Votes for names? Other ideas?

Van's Allure 2

For some reason (I am a strange cookie in many other ways, too), I don't prefer to work on the entirety of my story alone, then surprise everybody. I like to muse on something for a while, bounce ideas off a buddy, come back and do more revisions, then post. Adding a perspective has only worked out in my experience for the better.

Chocolatelova's been busy and it seems bad to bother her with my story when she doesn't have time to do her own, but perhaps I'll try catching her online D: My principal conflict is still ill-formed and so blah. blah blah blah.


Well, on to the non-whiny part of the post.

As I have mentioned before, Van's greatest attraction is the juxtaposition of his seriousness and his boyish self. To me, the boyish self is actually his natural self--selfish and a little spoiled, but with eagerness and full emotions--the self that comes out in front of Folken when they were young, in front of his mother, in front of Balgus, in front of Hitomi. The seriousness is his attempt to be a man, to be a king.

At the end of Esca, we are frustrated not only because V+H never really gets together, but also because we are left with a glimpse of an emerging Van, close on a path to balance between his two halves.

(I always thought of Van as the main character, actually.)

So one of the items I am exploring for DS is completion of this duality. A lot of fanfics on ff portray Van despising his burdensome responsibilities, but I don't think Van ever thought about it as a choice. He was born to be a king. His public and private lives are so enmeshed in him that they have instead become two intertwining parts of his personality. Duty is his life. But he is also just a man.

(I hope I will be able to do it. I really like writing Van.)

(Sometimes I feel like I write better essays than prose ; ; I write very pretentiously, I suppose.)


I forgot from where I grabbed this . It looks like a scan or a rough filter, but still a perfect Van.

Sources

Hello, hello!

My thoughts today jumped from the emerging central political conflict to the Tyrrhenia legacy. It had been in my mind for quite a while, bubbling and fermenting, but today's development was glorious.

We shall have our own version of Elysian Fields: "down the dank moldering paths and past the Ocean's streams they went, and past the White Rock and the Sun's Western Gates, and past the Land of Dreams, and soon they reached the fields where pale liliaceous asphodel and poplars grew." It will be a place to press into climax; a place for rest, cleansing, and comtemplation; and a place for graceful lamentation.

I am in debt to past books. LOTR, Chinese martial arts novels, the classics, Jane Austen--these all form the knowledge I draw from. No idea is ever original. Everything is simply an arrangement of a story we all already know.


Oh, I did write something this past week, so let's have it. I think I might have posted the previous version of this section, in Leal's POV. Van's is working out much better, and today you get a whole paragraph!

Leal had insisted that a wise king used the illusion of power as well as the practice of authority, though to Van's mind there was no real need. Even in the most remote countryside, his people have no trouble recognizing the crest on his sword and his mailed, trailing entourage. Leal and the rest overlook the importance inherent in the common shirt. His rule over Fanelia only benefited from his royal informalities: loyalty that could never be commanded by a "Sire" or even a "King Fanel", only only by a "Van-sama".

And now that I've written--my previous fears are unfounded, thank god. Nothing is ever so important in life as to keep going forward.


The asphodel:

Progress Update 16

I'm further into planning. Still building up the central conflict (it would be boring pretty quickly if it was just a V+H love story). The characters are expanding nicely, especially the supporting roles to bring the conflict into the forefront. It's so frustrating not to slip by any particulars here, since it's so exciting and complicated at the same time, and I wish somebody would hold my hand. Adhering to the pretense of literary fiction is pretty hard--though looking back through my notes history, the results are worth every furious head scratch in cluelessness.

I'm also in the beginnings of delineating countries with their culture, fashion, key players, agendas, etc in anticipation of the upcoming Palas meeting. My lack of dialogue in DS is really because I suck at it. Hopefully with preparation, I will be able to create real drama.

And with all these steps, another side of me feels like there's never an end to planning, so I should just go ahead and try out the next chs. 7 months of planning have already gone by with no prose. Perhaps I'm delaying the act of writing because I'm again afraid of not being as good as before, again afraid of disappointment, again afraid of writing.

Or maybe this doubt is just a game I play with myself. There's no reason to lose sight of my original goal--to make fanfiction into literary fiction. Readers pick DS out of many, many other stories they could have curled up with for the night, and I must remember not to flag. I have to remember my goals and the readers, and still settle for prose, characterization, story, meaning, and sense of completion above the rest.

Very Own Van

On a side note:
Now you can have your very own Van.

Hero

A big conflict for me is simplicity vs. details. There are, of course, elegant solutions to satisfy both--so perhaps I should try harder, but my brain capability is often limited, as my brother would readily tell you.

It's obvious (the simplicity conflict, not my IQ) from ff reader comments on DS. I would leave little details, but from readers' confusion, I am making too many assumptions. But then, it's so patronizing to spell out everything. I could blame the readers--but I am the author, the one who designed the plot and the particular way of words, so everything is really my own fault.

As I plan more and more of DS's plot (which should have been done a year ago when I first wrote ch1), the conflict between simplicity and details becomes clearer. I want to make the story conclusion satisfying. This would be most readily achieved with a Traditional Hero. In a way, in Esca the characters most impacted by the events were Van and Folken. Hitomi's journey wasn't nearly as complete as theirs, with their conflicts, falling away, dilemmas, eagerness, and redemption. Traditional Heroes provide a clear moral compass, completion of story, and emotional identification by readers.

But the way to use them require planning and skill. It could easily become a device and a resentment. Not using them, on the other hand, could also easily make DS into the Modern Literary Work with No Heros, Just a Lot of Suffering and Is Hella Boring category.

sigh.

Most likely I will go the Hero route with modifications. Elegant solutions, where are you?

Progress Update 15

One of my favorite development techniques is freewriting. Writing down thoughts to add to and put together puzzles seem to lead to new ideas. Plus it's one of my remaining few things to do on long commutes.

So now I am revising my plot. Again.

This time, though, there's actually integration between my previous two disjunct ideas. There's even more backstory and intrigue. And I'd like to finish hashing out the entire plotline this time around. As time goes on I keep finding oversights and mistakes in previous chs, but since I already released them on ff, it's unfair to modify them, even if they're just little details here and there that no one would probably care about, like the location of the Fanelian shrine, Van's description of plants, etc. But if I had thought of these details earlier, the chs would have been richer, more character-driven, and I'd be able to insert hints in layering complexity instead of mishmashing scraps together from the first 5 chs.

Well, I learned.

Another of my problems to solve is characters. There are 20 I'm re-employing and ~40 I'm making up for DS. Although, maybe it isn't really such a problem. Esca had a long list. LOTR is another prime example. I could make it work, if every one is distinct in his place and personality.

The third of the long list is Escaflowne battle scenes. I love sword scenes with and without mecha. I love love LOVE Escaflowne in dragon form. And so I keep having to create better and better plotline so I can have Van in battle, because many ideas are just so awkward that this contrivance would be against my vow to make DS realistic, not to mention it would make the story plain awful.

We'll see.

Fight from ep26.
/swoon

DS to do

1. revisit Atlantis legends and Plato
2. music lyrics for ideas
3. country profiles
4. character profiles
5. double-check dialogue, addresses/honorifics
6. re-establish plot structure into linearity (the most dreaded of all)
7. draw hierarchy chart for structure (esp. B, F, T, and D)
8. double-check story timeline/time progression
9. do "applied characterization" exercises for DS
10. decide on "destinations" for characters
11. reorganize notes and details

Bedtime arrives so soon: I really need to find a solution for DS. When I was writing (back in far away November!), I typically wrote in 4 hour blocks. And I edit too much to make handwriting at all possible (not to mention I think the last time I wrote in longhand was in high school for the English AP exam).

Bah. Humbug.


Picture of Atlantis (as described by Plato) on Wiki:

Hiatus

A note that's long overdue:
Ch6 will be out at the end of June.

Sorry ._, New job, long commute, and GRE prep are all eating into my spare time. I haven't stopped thinking about scenes, but any possible time to write and refine will have to come early June.

Soon, soon!

Selling

I really need to change to a different car, so here are some beloved books I've accumulated over the years from Japanese stores and websites that I'm selling. Click on thumbnails for bigger image. Please let me know if you would like more scans.


Manga:

Yakitate! Japan, books 1-20, $80

Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind, books 1-6, $40



Artbooks:

Escaflowne filmbooks, books 1-4, $20
Storybooks on eps 1-15 from shots. Esoteric series and design information on the bottom of every page, as well as art from design notebooks at the end.


Kenshin anime series artbook "best collection", $10


Kenshin KADEN, $18
Ultimate collection of Kenshin information. Notes from beginning to series to end of jinchu arc that manga volumes 1-28. Also pages on character, sword styles, etc.



Doujinshi:

Escaflowne, "Vision" published by Link Out (comedy), $6
Compilation of comedy pages.


Escaflowne, "Van Fanel Remodeling Project" by Minato Tajima (comedy, slightly adult), $10
A funny, lighthearted story by one of the best adult Escaflowne doujinshi artists.


Kenshin, "Saikai" by Shinji Yamaguchi (adult), $12
Popular adult Keshin doujinshi artist.


All are in excellent condition. The prices are ~50% of original cost and includes shipping, but are open to negotiation. Email in comment box for contact.

Esca Music 2

Uploaded mp3s:
OST1, OST2, OST3, Lovers Only, movie.

Feel free to contribute to my speculation on ep placement. (Track list is from Yoko Kanno Project. James also has the first few seconds of each track on the site.) These are from memory, until I set aside some time to match them with the series. In particular I have more trouble with music in fight sequences.

OST1
01. Yakusoku wa Iranai (Promises not Necessary)
TV edit (Lovers 01) as series intro.
02. Flying Dragon
battle on the river at the borders of Asturia and Freid, with Van, Allen, and the Dragonslayers, ep9.
Gem: Van, Hitomi, and Allen's escape from Zaibach, ep18.
03. Dance of Curse
the music during scene selection on DVD. Also Van's first fight inside Esca, ep2.
Gem: Van and Allen's last fight, ep26.
04. Murder
Balgus's death.
05. Escaflowne
?
06. Angel
Varie at the lake.
Gem: Van comes to get Hitomi, ep24.
07. Cubic
(fight sequence?)
08. Romance
Dryden & Millerna's wedding, ep20.
Gem: Millerna's declaration at Crusade's departure: "Allen, I will never give up", ep8.
09. NE ZU MI
Crusade crew storms Vione for Van's rescue mission, ep5.
10. Wings
Hitomi makes the 5 meter leap, ep5.
11. Gloria
Second part of track is recap on Romance.
12. Eyes
Van discovers Hitomi and Allen on the Meifia Bridge, ep20.
13. Empty the Pocket
Gem: Hitomi and Yukari on their way home, ep1.
14. White Dove
Van and Hitomi arrives in Asturia for the first time, ep6.
15. Mystic Eyes
TV edit (Lovers 19) as series ending credits.
16. Deja Blue
Marlene's music box that conceals her diary, ep13.

OST2
01. The Vision of Escaflowne
Van fighting Naria and Eriya at the Gate of Atlantis, ep17.
02. Fanelia
?
03. Ask the Owl
Van and Allen's first fight in guymelefs, ep3.
04. Charm
Van's moment with Escaflowne so it would become him, ep13.
05. Country Man
?
06. A Mole Man
Merle sizing up Hitomi in their sick bed, ep4.
07. Cradle Song
(Allen?)
08. Machine Soldier
(Dilandau and Dragonslayers?)
09. Shadow of Doubt
Folken's asylum with Asturia, ep23.
10. A Far Cry
Folken returns to Fanelia and waits for Van, ep22.
11. Market Place
?
12. Medicine Eater
?
13. Godds Drunk
?
14. Cat's Delicacy
Merle steals Hitomi's pendant, ep2.
15. Love
16. Hitomi's Theme
Span shot of Hitomi in her room against the Asturia night?
Gem: Van and Hitomi's conversation about their family, ep8.
17. If You
?

OST3
01. Short Notice
ep preview music
02. Arcadia
Hitomi enters Atlantis, ep17.
Gem: Folken and Van's reunion in Fanelia, ep22.
03. Epistle
(fight scene)
Gem: Van defeats Dragonslayers after healing from Escaflowne's repairs, ep14.
04. Farewell
Gem: Dryden explains secrets of Esca and calls upon the Ispanos, ep14.
05. Aoi Hitomi
Hitomi walks away from a fight with Allen, ep23.
06. Perfect World
Leon second meeting with Hitomi's grandma at Asgard and his thoughts for Encia, ep17.
07. I Recommend Instincts
Gem: Track team scene, ep1.
08. Scrappy
Naria and Eriya's nyan nyan kempo, ep20.
09. Shrilly
Fortona Temple in Freid, ep13.
10. Revenge
?
11. Illusion
?
12. Blaze
Escape while Freid's capital Godashim burns, ep13.
13. Fatal
Folken's whistle, ep5 and ep25.
14. Hikari No Naka E (Into the Light)
The second time Hitomi and Yukari talk about Amano leaving Japan, ep24.
15. Again
Gem: Hitomi tells the story of Escaflowne to Amano in school clinic, ep24.

Lovers Only
01. Yakusoku wa Iranai (Promises Not Necessary, TV edit)
Intro.
02. The Vision of Escaflowne (Take 2)
?
03. Memory of Fanelia
Gem: King Aston celebrates the magnificence of Escaflowne at the dinner table, ep7.
04. Dance of Curse
(see OST1 03)
05. Zaibach
Zaibach forces surround Freid, ep13?
06. Flying Dragon
(see OST1 02)
07. Cradle Song
(see OST2 07)
08. Tomodachi (Friends)
The CD that Hitomi picks up at the Asturian bazaar, ep6.
09. Bird Cage
Van, Allen, Hitomi as Dornkirk's prisoners in Zaibach, ep18.
10. Chain
Van's fight at Rampant Port, ep23?
Gem: Hitomi and Allen's kiss, ep19.
11. Epistle
(see OSt3 03)
12. Perfect World
(see OST 06)
13. Blaze (Take 2)
14. Hitomi Theme
(see OST2 16)
15. Angel
(see OST1 06)
16. Neko no Kimochi (Cat's Feelings)
(not in series?)
17. Arcadia
(see OST3 02)
18. Kaze ga Fuku Hi (The Days the Wind Blows)
(not in series?)
19. Mystic Eyes (TV Edit)
ending theme
20. The Story of Escaflowne ~ End Title
end of series

Edited 03/20: Added Gem's comments.

Marriage 2

A few thoughts I wrote for myself yesterday:
- Van's reactions in ep1 justified (mostly)
- Varie as person, wife, mother
- if V+H's expectations at end of series mirrored "Into the Light"
- V's control and experience in his domestic and diplomatic political fronts
- Fanelia's image before and after the war

And the last topic led me to think about an interesting point--in ep6 when Millerna met Allen et al. at Crusade's landing, she said she had visited Fanelia as a child while Folken was there. But why was Millerna (and presumably Aston) in Fanelia?

Since the timeline according to Escaflowne Compendium is
Millerna, Van, Hitomi born -15
Goau died -12
Folken disappears -10
Marlene goes to Freid -6
then it should have been at least 10 years ago.

Two possibilities: (1) Aston goes to pay respects for Goau's passing; or (2) They visit for another reason, most likely after Goau's death. But in Millerna's recollection, Van and Folken were playing on the castle grounds, so the remembrance of the scene was generally happy. And if Aston had visited for Goau's funeral, then he would have mentioned it to Van in their conversations and probably would not have tested Van and Escaflowne for their performance in the coliseum.

Even if it wasn't for Goau, travel on Gaea hardly seems comparable to our standards, so the trip should likely be for business. But the business that compelled Aston to bring his family along should also be personal enough to include the youngest princess. A potential marriage alliance, perhaps.

A closer look at their ages collaborates with the possibility:
Folken 25
Eries, Allen, Dryden 21
Millerna, Van 15

Marlene's age was never mentioned, but it should be close to Folken's. Considering Millerna's match with Dryden and Marlene's marriage to Freid, Aston should have been calculating for a suitable match either within Asturia to continue the throne line or with a royal household outside to strengthen diplomatic alliances.

If Aston did consider Folken and Fanelia, and decided on Freid instead, then it could have been its larger territory, the Duke was already in power (as opposed to Folken yet a king), or a number of other factors. But it is an interesting thought that if different choices were made, Folken and Marlene could have been together. (And then, would Marlene and Allen still be together?)

Wings 2

I'm getting closer to actual writing progress, finally (after 4 months! I can't believe it's been so long. Where did all that time go?).

As I mentioned before, I tend to get great ideas right before I fall asleep, and then become torn between getting out of bed immediately to write it down or relying on my horrible memory and that invariably turns into "oh shit I had a really great idea yesterday but I can't remember what it is aggh~".

Anyway, yesterday night I thought up a good scene for ch6's end. Exciting. It'll be similar to ch4's end, except, well...you'll see :D I'm still deciding how dangerous I'd like to make it--spark or no spark between our antitheses of Romeo and Juliet. There are justifications for both possibilities, although my inclination is to go with my usual amusement based on Van's embarrassment and close calls. It's just much more fun that way.


I've been thinking about offering my extra Esca filmbooks as rewards for the Esca music project or as prizes for a little game within DS chs. I can't decide if it's my most brilliant idea or retardedly lame. Perhaps it depends on what the question is.


This picture (v) always shocks and confuses me. I'm always thinking: Why are they naked? Isn't Esca supposed to a teen series? And why isn't Van molting everywhere? It's confounding D:

Does my inner hopeless realist show through when I consider Van too gentlemanly to do anything like this inappropriate embrace within current confines of their relationship? (Oh man, I could write an entire essay on my views of V+H doujinshi I linked to the other day--part of me goes "I can't stop staring at the beautiful art" and the other part goes "no, no, Van, tell me it's not true. Noooo".) Or maybe it's actually because I'm too much an idealist to consider it in character with Van's dismal performance in ep19.

Nevertheless, the picture has inspired numerous fanfiction renditions of glorious wings in hugs and beds. And that's why I've vowed (yes, vowed!) there's none of that in DS. Wings are precious things, not meant for requests and displays. Wings mean more than dreams and flying. Wings should carry their own meanings of "deeper than the sky".

And let's stop there. It'll be so much better within its ch than here, I promise.

Esca Music

This week while I'm organizing music for a request by Algelic I realized that I have all of the Escaflowne soundtracks except for the Yubiwa single and the Jeture audio drama.

Although the Yoko Kanno Project is fantastic, especially its efforts in lyrics transcription, one of my dream Esca projects is to list each track with the corresponding episode number. I think it'll enhance the emotional nuance of the particular scene when we listen to the music alone. But even with repeat viewings of the series, some of these tracks are hard to pinpoint. Perhaps I'll ask for reader assistance in the project when I post ch6.

Favorite tracks: First Vision (movie), Romance (OST1), Eyes (OST1). And of course, Into the Light (OST3), DS's theme song ;3

Curiously, on all three OST covers, Hitomi's eyes are purple.

Hitomi

Previously I had believed in putting pieces of myself within Hitomi in DS. And I think that's why I enjoyed writing Van more, partly perhaps I hesitate to bare certain things for public viewing, and partly because Van had his real voice. But as Hitomi's development will be even more critical than Van's, since she had moved further away from that point 10 years earlier, and as I must know what she thinks of events in ch4-6, it's time to write her real voice.

Let's establish "the facts" first:
Hitomi Kanzaki
25 years old, 12/9, 165cm
University of Toyko veterinary division
4 years junior veterinarian in partnership
lives at home with parents in Kamakura
boyfriend: Sousuke Yamamoto

Since anime/manga creators frequently use astrology signs and blood type as pointers in their characters, here's Wiki's Sagittarius entry:
Individuals born under this sign are thought to have a dynamic, clever, quick witted, intellectual, ethical, humorous, generous, open-hearted, compassionate, and energetic character, but one which is also prone to pridefulness, impulsiveness, impatience, impracticality, and blind optimism. Sagittarians are said to like traveling, getting to the heart of the matter, freedom, laws and meanings, and the general "feel" of things. They do not like off the wall theories, being tied down domestically, being constrained, cooling their heels, and being bothered with details.

And then:
How does 10 years change her to make her more normal?
Look past her ambiguity in her relationship with Sousuke for real feelings.
Memories vs. perception of Van's changes vs. Van's perception of her changes.
What does Hitomi want? What is she afraid of?

In ep26, right before Hitomi sees an image of Van, what was she thinking?

Doujinshi 4

The Love&Peace website/blog by the Japanese doujinshi artist Tajima Minato has relocated due to foreigners using her work without permission. That made me very sad, and also made me think about my own posts of doujinshi images here. Although my intention is to promote their work, it's still using their work without permission. I'm not sure what my answer is yet, since for the most part I've only posted coverpages.

But some of their restrictions are unreasonably severe--one circle asks for readers to not download any images at all and delete ones they already have. On the technical side, there's no real way to restrict the user from saving images, since the images have already been downloaded when the page loaded, and the act of saving it into a folder different from temporary internet files is merely on the browser side. Even if the page disables right-clicking, there are ways to get around it. (And it also makes page navigation a hindrance, grr.) On the human nature side, people like to collect beautiful things.

And really, there's no good prevention of fraud and theft on the web. A lot of utilities and programs are actually designed for the downloader in mind, and prevent other people from seeing the real download. There is a Chinese saying "Boundaries higher by a feet, Lawlessness higher by a yard". I believe that we have to take good preparation to protect ourselves, and then trust the rest.

As for Love&Peace, I'm ambivalent. It's true that websites shouldn't scan and publish her doujinshi, but then, it's so difficult for us out of Japan to get our hands on her work that I can't help but cherish websites like Herya. (warning: explicit art.)

Is there a middle ground? I'm not sure.

Her new book that I'd love to get to read:

Goau

I'd like to incorporate Gaou and Varie as part of the storyline puzzle, but working with Goau has been more difficult than Varie. Perhaps partly it's because of the lack of father figures in Esca: Goau dies young, Balgus dies in ep2, Aston is more a king than a family presence, Dryden has no respect for Meiden, Leon left his family behind, and Hitomi's father was hardly mentioned--all except Freid.

Although Goau and Varie's deaths have more impact on Van's upbringing and motivations than Merle losing her entire family, in Van's memories, we only see Varie weeping at Goau's deathbed and his gravestone--never any interaction between father and son. Folken and Balgus took Goau's place in teaching and playing with Van since he was 3. So it's difficult to say what Van remember of Goau or expect him to be.

But despite all this, the most significant pressure from Goau is actually his lack of presence. As tantamount as Van's royal position and his Draconian heritage is being an orphan with all the expectancy carried over from the absent Varie and Goau. So even if I do not carry him over to DS, it's important to answer questions about Goau in order to understand Van. Two main issues: who was Goau, and how does his life and death impact Van?

I think of Goau as an older version of Van, had Van been more well adjusted. He was obviously a person with great distinction and inspiration--he was revered enough for someone like Balgus to follow into battles, generous enough to allow Balgus a training leave, and respected enough for Balgus to rush back to Fanelia in loyalty. His legacy prompted Balgus to take over Van's training and life for 10 years.

Yet he was more than leadership to his men, he was of emotions. By the time he met Varie, he was already 30, so he must have been rejecting other potential matches until he fell in love immediately with Varie at the lake. His love completely disregarded all caution, logic, and any other voices of conventional wisdom. He was a man of immediate action and reaction--and Van, at the very least in this respect, turned out to be just like his father. (Though, I must say, Goau was more charming. Sorry, Van.)

But the question remains: how did he die? There were a few clues, but none absolutely telling in its clarity: (1) It must have been a private matter--if it was death from battle or political trouble, Fanelia must have been in an uproar, and Van and Balgus would have vowed vengeance. But instead his death was lightly carried over, with only the leadership of the crown laid heavily on Folken's shoulders. (2) He died at the age of 48, hardly old, as Balgus was 70 at the start of Esca. (3) When Balgus rushed back, he had said "I was too late"--so the manner of Goau's death must have been relatively long, at least enough for Balgus to hear the news from a messenger or rumors and then transverse back from wherever he was training. (4) In opposition to #3, Goau's death must have been relatively sudden, as there is no memory of a bedridden Goau, nor did he look sick at all on his deathbed.

So many diseases and ways to die to still choose from. An acute illness, perhaps, or a severe accident. I'm undecided whether I should make it terribly shocking or romantic.

Making plans for a modified remake of this scene :3a

Mistakes

Ch6 will have to be rewritten.

Although Leal as the narrator gives an interesting perspective on Van, beyond that, there's nothing else to gain. It's wrong to allow more than Van and Hitomi as narrators, at this point. The experience of the events would be better told by Van, so we can once more look into his feelings without the usual distance he requires. Besides, I'm sure the readers will enjoy the political matters more if Van is giving the running dialogue ;3

I really value Jossi and other readers' input on here and as comments directly on ff. They always remind me the importance of a "story". DS isn't just an exercise in writing, it's a medium for readers to experience V+H's feelings.

Ironically, I seem to be busier without a job than with a job. I need to start scheduling writing time again.

Tsubasa no Kami has in-depth information about the Esca movie. And I had mentioned in my first posts that she hosts the only known map of Gaea. A total help for me :D This is from her program gallery page:

Character Profile

The most common mistake I see on ff is treating character profile as a list of physical markings. In addition to smearing the writing into lower class with simplified descriptions of a tall and brown haired man, authors are missing out on the most vital and powerful aspect of fiction: characterization.

There must be overwhelming background evidence to tell how characters will act in a certain situation. (Not all presented to the readers, of course.) And then it's the author's craft to connect the dots to make the experience pleasurable by the confirmation or surprise.

Of course, physical descriptions are important to bringing the characters alive in imaginations. But even in our first impressions with a stranger, there are numerous details we consciously and intuitively receive. Is he in good shape? How clean and stylish are her clothes? Does she wear flashy jewelry with flip-flops? Is he hunching to appear less noticeable? Does she hold her coffee cup with her little finger out or cradle it in both hands? Doe she look elegant but destroy the picture by saying insensible things? All of these are physical things, but they give so much more character information than sky blue eyes.

The best part to me in the film Stranger than Fiction was the part when Harold Crick says his favorite word is "integer." I had loled, because it's a word that completely defines his personality and behaviors.

As an exercise today I wrote the Esca characters' words. They're not their favorite, really, but words that I think exemplify them. So here's the list of their Esca-timeline words, though I've still to define (and keep secret from you, mwhaha) their DS words. And let me know if I've hit or missed the mark!

Van - trust
Hitomi - hope
Merle - Van
Allen - companionship
Millerna - love
Dryden - power
Aston - country
Eries - propriety
Chid - filial duty
Celena - emptiness

As for doing complete character profiles, I must admit I haven't finished them yet either. I think at this point I'd better concentrate on the next ch, rather than filling out the list to its entirety. But I do consider many of the following points as I work through scenes, and here's a partial list. For in-depth strategies and examples, pick up the book The Plot Thickens.

outward appearance. posture.
mode of dress. fabrics. expense. style. colors.
words. phrases. sentence to live by.
favorite colors, animals, foods, smells, places. reading material. music. art. decoration style.
family situation and relationship
history. jobs. education. occupation.
outlook on life. future plans.
personality. quirks.
distinguishing characteristic.
likes and dislikes.
recreation. hobbies. vacations.
circle of friends. types of enemies. past lovers.
perception vs. reality

One of my favorite pictures of Van is him in ending credits. It seems to say so many different things. And why is it? It's not his excuse of a shirt, or his hair, or his long lashes. The mystery comes from his closed eyes, that highlight on the bridge of his nose and his lips, his self-hug. Is it expectation, acceptance, waiting, or loneliess? Only Van knows.

Deadline

My new goal for DS is to finish ch6 by end of February. I've been avoiding definite deadlines because writing is for fun, not work, but I think it's gotten to the point that I need to get off my butt and let stress motivate me to higher performance. Readers need new chs, and I need to start writing again.

Still, my plans for the latter part of DS have been more exciting than ever. The last chs of V+H's story will be roomfuls of effervescent bubbles ;D I rub hands in anticipation just thinking about it. It's been really hard to restrain myself from writing those scenes out already, even though I know those will change by the time I get there in the storytelling.

Now off to continue my consideration of Fanelia's budget for airships.

Lack of Updates

Had a few more ideas about the last few chs of DS. The events surrounding their romance is going to be awesome. V+H will be true to character down to the last bits.

Which, of course, is totally useless for anything I can publish for ch6 on ff.net ; ; In my only defense, I can only say that when pressed with looming thunder overhead, I tend to become an ostrich and bury my sight as far underground as it would go.

But seriously, I've been mired in fixing my computer and thinking really hard about the last two years to write interview responses. I'm contemplating a job making cappuccinos, so I can at least have an income while I look for something more career-while.

To celebrate my 100th post on DS, I opened a random thoughts blog, Jomiel Says. It's just for fun and giggles.

Progress Update 14

I'm having trouble thinking about and finishing ch6. This makes me wonder if it's because I'm subconsciously sensing failure even if I work it to completion. But there's nothing obviously wrong. Hitomi meets Van in the library and they have a conversation. Am I intimidated by their dialogue, the subject, or perhaps what might happen if I let them speak freely? I'm not sure.

I do, however, think a lot about the middle and the end of DS. This week has been very cold, and fitting cold into Hitomi's capture would especially highlight the whole miserable experience. You fist your hands to spark some feeling into them, your toes tingle with hurt when they're in tepid water, the feeling that your hands would never be warm even if they burrow underneath your arms because your whole body has become cold--but of course I have to careful, because descriptions are just words. Actions elicit feelings.

Although, I suppose cold is sort of a strange thing for me to put in, considering that the Esca crew traveled from Fanelia to Zaibach to Asgard, and they never seem to feel cold. In particular, Van and Hitomi regularly traveled at airship altitudes but never seem to feel the subzero temperature. *shiver* (Ironically, the only one with enough sense to wear a coat was Leon, the labeled madman.)


Chibi Hitomi and Van:

Dryden

One idea of mine for a long time is to make Asturia the Gaean equivalent of "the West". Its power amid the Alliance countries, its foreign policy attitude that influences country relationships with each other, possible colonialization, its reception as threat and obstacle among other countries, etc.

Of course, to make that happen, King Grava Aston cannot remain ruler of Asturia. His actions during the Gaea War was self-preservation. But if Dryden becomes king...

Dryden is certainly my favorite secondary character. His brash confidence, his understanding of wealth as a powerful tool, his charismatic and decisive leadership, his bookish nature--all these make him an appealing, complex character.

And I think given the opportunity, he could become someone who'd understand Hitomi the best (after Van, of course--and Van's case is evident in ep24 when he answered where Hitomi went).

I'm going to have a lot of fun with Dryden :D

Goong

From Sapphirefly's post and link, this weekend I read Goong up to vol 10. It is surprisingly romantic, despite the gender inequality. (Even though the manhwa explained the women's lack of independence and power as court culture, inequality is much more prevalent in East Asia, as can be seen from the public censure of Hyo-Rin and Chae-Gyeong's feelings of inadequacy when Shin is absent.) Some page had said Goong was made in the wake of Hana Yori Dango's popularity (which spawned anime, movies, tv series, as well as Taiwan drama series Meteor Garden), but I see Goong as a cross between manhwa and traditional twists on Cinderella like My Fair Lady--the transformation into a swan is just the beginning, and Chae-Gyeong doesn't change things by reversing traditions and values, but by following them in her own way.

Since Goong is now licensed for the US and fan translations hard to get, I tried out the drama in an effort to finish the story, but seeing Shin change from SoHee Park's beautiful art into a real boy is a total crush of hopes. I find her art similar in style to Kaori Yuki's Angel Sanctuary and Godchild--elaborate hair, beautiful men, women with a gothic romance feel. Now that I'm back in the Bay Area, perhaps I'll go to the rental manga store again and finish the series in Chinese.

As for how this all relates to Esca... It does give me shivers on a new AU story (just imagining Van dressed up in the fashionable male ideal of East Asia like Shin makes me excited), but most of all, the romance in Goong is fantastically self-deprived and slow. And then when it does come, the romance blooms into this dramatic satisfaction. Gives me ideas.

Almost all of my favorite authors updated during the holiday break. I should get going, too.

New Year

During vacation, I read The Name of the Rose--it was brilliant in its languages, not only in its English construction (originally written in Italian), but also its Middle Ages structure and its use of foreign languages (mostly Latin, but also Greek, French, German, dialects of Italian, and references to Arabic). The PS section from the author was also interesting. Eco talked about how he conceived the idea and how he worked to its completion. I should find Poe's "Philosophy of Composition" again and reread it.

Again, no updates on DS; I'm sorry ._. I'm trying to find a job and live as much free time as possible, as contradictory as the two sound...